Watch For A Fireball Tonight

So, isn't there some kind of cosmic event tonight, then?
Well, yes there is. Tonight marks the beginning of a traditional holiday known as Christmas, where a white bearded overweight benevolent man named Santa Claus will be travelling through the atmosphere so blindingly fast that he will vaporize the air he flies through. Why would he do this? Well, to deliver gifts to every child on the planet, of course!

Santa Claus burning up the atmosphere on Christmas Eve

Old Saint Nick, or Father Christmas, or just plain old Santa, as he's known, will use a little studied propulsion technology known as Nuclear Reindeer, with a bizarre red nose based guidance system called Rudolph. The number of children actually covered under the service agreement varies dependant on several criteria, not least of all an index of goodness which is applied to each child and administered by a vision system Santa wears throughout the year that automatically logs naughty behaviour. Global Climate Change is often adversely affected by a high instance of naughty children, who are rewarded for their transgressions with lumps of coal. The bakery and dairy industries across the planet are taxed to their structural limits as Saint Nick uses a Mr. Fusion unit to convert cookies and milk collected from the houses he visits along the way into reindeer fuel.

NASA has yet to detect the fireball created by Santa's travels, although this is likely the result of a high instance of excited children throughout the homesteads of NASA personnel. This doesn't mean you shouldn't at least try to catch a glimpse of the flaming Santa Claus in the sky though, as apparently the wake he leaves behind is felt for months after - or at least until the decorations fairy comes along to switch off all those annoying twinkly lights!

Merry Christmas, Spacers!

Image credit: NASA
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